-----Based on our Japanese blog-----
This is Meshi, here to serve up another heaping helping of figure reviews. You wouldn't know by looking at that pretty face, but Mataemon is a Dark Samurai revived by the villainous Shiro Amakusa. Is her sinfully decadent body the result of evil necromancy or good genetics? Let's dig in for the truth!
Hyakka Ryoran Samurai Bride - Mataemon Araki 1/7 Complete Figure [Kaitendoh]
Mataemon must have crazy upper body strength to balance such a heavy load without any support. Of course I'm talking about how she one-hands that cleaver! Maybe the secret to her iron grip is under those forearm wraps--it's the only thing she seems interested in covering.
A closer look reveals a mole under her eye, the only blemish on an otherwise immaculate face. Personally I find such imperfections to be the hidden hotness that helps a figure stand out in a collection. The way her breasts threaten to slope out of her shirt don't hurt either.
Her blouse is pushing our site's PG-13 rating--and my heartbeat--to the limit. Couple that with her barely-there miniskirt and Meshi's old ticker is thumping like a jackrabbit. Better take my pills before I turn my attention to her exquisitely round rump. Talk about a man killer!
A cold gust should help cool me down, but it's doing just the opposite. It's causing the frills of her skirt to fan out like an inverted cupcake liner to reveal a dollop of pink frosting on top. Too bad there's no candle to blow out.
Pinwheel, pinwheel, breezy and bright. Spin me good morning, spin me good night. Nothing gets my jets roaring like the way a strong blast of air creates creases in clothing. The lines are so crisp, so clean, you can practically taste her scent on the wind. The breeze isn't the only thing that's stiff.
That's the longest bellybutton that I've ever seen! How many other figures can you name that look like they had a C-section? Like the mole, it's one of Mataemon's concealed charms. Can you find the others? She's cast-off enabled for a reason.
Though a Dark Samurai by trade, her body has shown me the light--no more sickly thin figures, give me a girl with extra meat! Seeing her shapely legs slide in those boots like hot dog casings is enough to make me swear off vegetables forever.
Don't let her cool demeanor fool you--Mataemon will cleave your heart to pieces! If you thought she lorded over the rest of the show's cast, just see how imposing she is on your figure shelf--clothed or otherwise.
Hyakka Ryoran Samurai Bride - Mataemon Araki 1/7 Complete Figure by Kaitendoh
*Photos are of a prototype and the actual product may differ.